The Stuff of Life

These days I’ve been feeling stuck on repeat

I feel the colors of my world slipping

The pencil is hard to push ‘cross the sheet

Quickly, shorter my focus is chipping

Is this all that life is supposed to be?

Monotone beats with no sound to pursue?

No, life must be more than dull misery

Life is much more than just making through

Life is the fear before stepping on stage

And noticing the way that others shine

Life enjoying every day that you age

And the sting of the cold on winter nights

Life is the moments when you know you’re whole

Life is feeling every part of your soul

The Beast in Her Chest

There is a monster eating her inside

It grabs her heart and claws through her rib cage

It chokes her lungs and makes her hate her mind

Dark creature that is sad yet full of rage

It started small and slowly grew in size

From worried girl afraid of doing wrong

To young woman with anxious, worried eyes

The beast and girl dancing to this cruel song

When she felt ensnared in the monster’s game

And the girl thought she was sunk in despair

She found a strength that set her soul aflame

She tamed that beast, now set free from its snare

The monster still lives, asleep in her chest

But now she can live, the beast has been best

A Sonnet for Infatuation

The first time we met, it was just preschool

We shared an innocent kiss, or a few

The next time we met, love made me a fool

Again, you vanished, for a year, then two

Then you walked into my heart like a thief

You faded soon when I saw your true face

You came and went on the wind like a leaf

Now and then I’d catch you, new face, new place

Each time is a risk, myself I must warn

I thought you were love; I knew you were lust

But each time you are new, each time reborn

Once you were a stone, once you were stardust

Each time you leave, I hope for a cliché:

One day we’ll met, and for once, you will stay

10 Ways To Be Better

1. Be willing to work
2. Make things easier for others whenever you can
3. Cry when you need to, even if you think you'll feel weak
4. Understand that there are ups and downs in life
5. And understand that there can always be joy
6. Listen to good music and let it inspire you
7. Give yourself the right to be passionate
8. Allow others the comfort to be themselves and see how beautiful the human race can be
9. Cherish good conversations
10. And remember that you're never as alone as you feel, because that's how everyone feels

Find joy in the dull and inspiration in the ordinary.

And don't let anyone stop you from living when there is so much to live for.

To The Future Someone in My Life

I'm not asking for much.

Just a kiss, no, not even that, just for you to hold my hand.

In public

To be willing to show everyone you think I'm worth holding onto, at least for now.

I'm not asking for much.

Just a nice conversation about nothing and everything beneath a streetlamp, one that makes me keep putting off heading home.

I'm not asking for much.

Only someone to tell my aunt about so she'll leave me alone when she inevitably asks about my love life at Thanksgiving.

I don't want flowers. They wilt.

I don't want promise rings. They rust.

No fancy gifts or tickets to Hawaii or fancy candlelit dinners or chocolates.

Wait wait wait.

Backup.

I'll take the chocolates.

I'm not expecting you to be without flaws, just for you to accept me and mine.

I'm not asking for you to walk straight out of a chick flick with a suit and a tie and a dozen roses. Just for you to be there when I watch a rom com, either with your arm around me or even just in my mind, helping me think about how glad I am that Meg Ryan isn't the only one with love in her life.

When I see all the other couples wandering around with sparkly eyes, who can't keep their hands off each other I clench my teeth.

Because they're gross,

And because I'm also jealous.

I mean, how dare they! Be happy and in a dumb relationship while I'm over here with no one to hug but my three-legged cat.

My friends have someone to love, or had someone to love and I have

No one.

I used to be one of those strong and independent women who don't need no man and I still am

But I'm tired.

I'm tired of being strong and I'm tired of being patient.

But I'm not asking for much.

Just for you to come into my life with a smile

And say hello.